I have a very good friend, Paul, whom I also used to work
with. He retired a few years ago and spends his days keeping very active taking
his motorcycle on multi-week cross country trips, jogging, playing tennis,
working around his house and spending time with his grandkids.
I attended his 70th birthday celebration a couple
of years ago and I kid you not when I say the man has a full head of thick brown hair. He’s got very few wrinkles
except for the ones probably caused from the countless hours of wind in his
face and sunshine while riding his Harley over the years. He’s in great shape
and is surrounded by a fantastic family
I asked him once what his secret to his apparent eternal
youth was and his answer became burned in my mind. He said, “Nelson, it’s all
about pacing yourself”. Pretty simple advice on the surface but when you
consider today’s fast-paced lifestyle and burning-the-candle-at-both-ends-to-stay-ahead
mentality that we all seem to live by, that guidance is much easier said than
done. Far too many people live by the adage of “live fast, die young and leave
a good looking corpse”.
One of the things I got out of our conversation that day –
and I’m paraphrasing here – was his relating the “pacing yourself” thing to
drinking wine (or liquor or beer. I can’t recall the specific vice). He told me
he enjoyed a good glass of wine once in a while but he knew early on that he’d
be around much longer to savor that grapey goodness if he did not binge drink.
Rather, a glass of wine every night is better than a bottle or three a couple
of nights a week. He enjoyed the wine much more when he had it in moderation
and his body appreciated his pacing himself and avoiding the hangovers, waking
up on the sidewalk and being too sick to do anything for days at a time that
comes with drinking too much of a good thing.
Where am I going with this, you might ask? Well, I’ve had
the occasion recently to observe people overindulging in…of all things, work.
Working on holidays, working late nights every night, working every weekend.
Missing family vacations, birthdays, kids school events, dinners around the
table.
Binge working.
Trust me, I’m a consultant. I get it. Sometimes you’re on
the road a lot, clients have problems, go-lives, deadlines. You name it. They
work weeks on end without a day off. They miss out on vacation time because of their
company’s use-it-or-lose-it policy. Their kids learn how to walk, ride a bike,
throw a baseball, drive a car and go off to college while they go on their
multi-year work bender. Their grandparents die, their parents get old and frail,
and neighbors come and go without ever meeting them.
Eventually, binge working does to their body, mind and soul
what binge drinking does. It burns them out. They realize too late that they
are sick and tired of being sick and tired. At the end of their working life, after
having given it their all, they are spent. No fond memories of fun times spent
with friends and family. A body that has been neglected from lack of exercise
and years of crappy restaurant food.
I have three words for that; Fuck. That. Shit
Speaking for myself, I’m a hard worker and will go on the occasional
“binge” when the situation calls for it – crunch time on a project, covering
for co-workers or making up for lost time. I pride myself on delivering a
quality product and giving my employer more than they are paying me for. But I
insist on pacing myself like my friend, Paul. I worked with him and he was not
a slacker. He got all his work done, plus some in a 40 hour week but he managed
to achieve that work-life balance that seems to be so elusive to many. He
prioritized staying fit and recharging his batteries. His family took
precedence over everything and he was able to push himself away from the job
when he’d had enough.
I’ll give my employer the 40 per week that they are paying
me for and once in a while, I’ll give them 50 or 60. If that’s not enough or
they come to expect me working every night, weekend and holiday, I’ll find
another employer or client. Like Paul, I hope to master the art of balancing
work and life – I’m not there yet – but I’d like to encourage some of those
people I see to put down that bottle of work and try a glass at a time,
instead.
I want to be like Paul. I want to pace myself and have
enough left over at the end. I want to be able to look back on great memories
and fun times I've had with family and friends and yes, at work.
It’s all about moderation.
